Cynical Musings
  • Blog
  • Copywriting
  • Published Works
  • Contact
  • Humor
    • WTF Fridays
      • Commerical Commentary
        • Jokes
        • Quotable Quotes
        • 2012 Election
        • History1
          • Time Periods Index
            • Stone Age>
              • Palaeolithic
                • Mesolithic
                  • Neolithic
                  • Egypt>
                    • Early Egypt>
                      • Pre-Dynastic
                        • Early Dynastic
                          • Old Kingdom
                            • 1st Intermediate
                              • Middle Kingdom
                                • 2nd Intermediate
                                  • New Kingdom
                                  • Later Eygpt>
                                    • 3rd Intermediate
                                      • Saite Period
                                        • Late Period
                                          • Hellenistic/Ptolemaic Period
                                            • Post-Dynastic
                                          • Catholic Church
                                            • Europe
                                            • History2
                                              • America>
                                                • Discovery & Founding 986-1787
                                                  • Testing a Union 1788-1865
                                                    • Forging A Nation 1866-1900
                                                      • 20th Century, Part I: 1901-1950
                                                        • 20th Century, Part II: 1951-2000
                                                          • 21st Century
                                                          • Druid
                                                          • History 3
                                                            • Eygptian Religion>
                                                              • Index of Gods
                                                                • Myths & Stories
                                                                • Astrology (History)
                                                                  • New Page
                                                                  • History 4
                                                                  Reader Comment 11/12/2011
                                                                  0 Comments
                                                                   
                                                                  I always appreciate reader comments, especially when they throw a new light, or a different view on something I've published.  I was amazed when I looked up the news reference she cited!  Here is her comment, copied exactly. 

                                                                  So, thanks to Joyce at http://joycelansky.blogspot.com

                                                                  The ultra-wealthy have used their money and influence to elect politicians who have taken away regulations on businesses and provided multiple loop holes so that companies are not paying their fair share of taxes. The result of this practice has been an extremely lopsided wealth distribution where the rich get richer while the middle class is shrinking. If the rich don't start paying their fair share of taxes, I'm afraid we will snow ball into another Great Depression. Ironically, the first one resulted from Presidents Harding and Coolidge allowing businesses free reign to do what they wanted, just like now.

                                                                  General Electric made $14.2 billion in profits in 2010, but paid NO taxes because the bulk of those profits, some $9 billion, were offshore. In fact, GE got a $3.2 billion tax benefit.(1) Multiple economists have said that the way out of this mess is to stimulate jobs while taxing the rich. However, the Republican Congress refuses to do anything to fix the problem because they have been bought out by the wealthy and cater to their whims. Furthermore, Republicans don't want to do anything to fix the economy because that could mean re-election for Obama, and politics have become more important than the benefit of the people. This sounds like TREASON to me!

                                                                  Yes! Be careful who you vote for in 2012.

                                                                  (1) http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/general-electric-paid-federal-taxes-2010/story?id=13224558#.Tr9HUvI8eBo

                                                                  Add Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  Blue Sky Scrubs 11/08/2011
                                                                  0 Comments
                                                                   
                                                                  Who said that working in medicine meant having to wear shapeless scrubs with no personality and little attention spent on fashion?  As a dedicated fashion fan (trust me, I actually look forward to Vogue arriving each month!), I was surprised and pleased to discover Blue Sky Scrubs, located at: http://www.blueskyscrubs.com/

                                                                  With stitching on the pockets (both back pockets for the pants, single pocket for the tops), a variety of colors, and a better "cut" than the average pair of scrubs, Blue Sky Scrubs brings a professional look to the standard nursing garb.  In addition to scrubs, they offer lab coats, shirts, jackets, and other accessories, making this an ideal shopping spot for everyone in the medical industry, not just nurses.  There are a variety of options for both men and women.  They even have a miniature sets for kids!

                                                                  For "cut" of the fabric, I like the urban scrubs, which feature low-rise pants vice the original scrubs, which have something "between a flare-leg and boot-cut" (in the companies; own words).  As for color choices, my personal favorite is the hot pink scrubs, though the crimson ones they are offering for the holiday season are a close second.  My absolute favorite thing about Blue Sky Scrubs is the fact that they are accredited by the Better Business Bureau, meaning you can shop with confidence, knowing you are dealing with a reputable company. 
                                                                  Add Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  WTF Friday 11/04/2011
                                                                  0 Comments
                                                                   
                                                                  As I've been looking through blogs, I've seen lots of "cute" names for the days- mysterious Mondays, wordless Wednesdays, etc.  None of them really seemed to sum up my accurate, but cynical, view of life.  And then I realized there is one thing that I think all of the time! "WTF!?" 

                                                                  If you are offended by the "F" pretend it stands for frak (as on Battlestar Galactica) or for "freezing Popsicles in Hades"....though if you're offended by the "F", you probably don't visit here all that often. 

                                                                  First of all, WTF is up with everyone having a heart attack over Herman Cain's campaign manager Mark Block smoking a freakin' cigarette?  Please.  19.8% of Americans smoke.  Get over it.  You can't catch lung cancer by SEEING someone smoke on a television ad or internet video.  Really.  I promise. 

                                                                  WTF is up with the crazy spam e-mails I get.  I'm not sure how my name got on these lists or if they are just typing in random letter combinations hoping to hit an actual e-mail, but just in the last week, I've gotten offers for the following:
                                                                  "Sexy older singles" are apparently interested in me.  As are "bored housewives."  In addition, though I'm female, I've also received e-mails about enlarging a part of the anatomy I don't have.  And, of course (I think everyone gets these), I'm an approved "insider" into getting information on how to make thousands a day!  I've also won multiple ipads, video game systems, and five lotteries, in the last week alone. 

                                                                  People wearing pants with writing across the behind (such as "Pink" or "Hot").  I can put up with that even though I don't get it, but what really gets me saying "WTF?!" is when the letters are jiggling like jell-o.  Seriously, either a bigger pair of pants or less calories per day.  Your choice. 

                                                                  WTF is up with people complaining about their weight while at the same exact time eating a calorie-laden unhealthy dish.  Honestly, you can weigh what you want, I don't care.  You can eat what you want, I don't care.  But don't complain to me about your weight while eating a decadent dessert with about 900 calories in.  While you're eating a healthy meal, fine.  Just not dessert. 

                                                                  PETA is suing SeaWorld, accusing them of violating the 13th Amendment by enslaving five killer whales.  WTF?

                                                                  Florida Teen claims that she is "part vampire, part werewolf."  She is currently being charged with accessory to murder. 

                                                                  I was watching "Toddlers and Tiaras" the other day.  It was horrible.  But I just couldn't look away.  Because it was so horrible.  Help....

                                                                  I was browsing E!Online (they're a great source for WTF Fridays material), and saw a television show titled "Bridalplasty."  From the tagline under the title, it seems as if the winner gets free plastic surgery before their "Big Day."   I refuse to spend another second finding any more information about this show. 

                                                                  Feel free to share your WTF moments.  If sufficiently humorous, I'll include them in a later post!
                                                                  Add Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  Commercial Commentary 10/31/2011
                                                                  0 Comments
                                                                   
                                                                  Well, let’s start with the definition. 
                                                                  Commercial: [kuh-mur-shuhl] noun.   A paid radio and/or television advertisement or promotional announcement.
                                                                  Commentary: [kom-uhn-ter-ee] noun. A series of comments, explanations, or annotations.

                                                                  Now, on to the commentary.  Haven’t you ever seen a commercial and your jaw just dropped open?  You were thinking: “You have to be kidding me?!”  This week, I’m going to cover the somewhat embarrassing topic of various personal care items and the ridiculous lengths advertisers will go to in order to transfer money from your wallet to their bank account. 

                                                                  Here are three that have caught my attention:

                                                                  Feminine care product advertisements in general- why are the women always so happy?  Even the new commercial- the one that makes fun of the old “dancing on the beach, smiling softly, wind blowing through the hair” advertisements- shows happy women!   Trust me, no woman is going to choose what feminine care products to purchase based on a commercial, no matter how happy the women look.   

                                                                  I saw an ED pump advertisement claiming that it was covered by Medicare.  Honestly, I don’t care enough to research this, but did find the site online, again with the claim that it was covered by Medicare.  You have got to be kidding me!?!

                                                                  I was watching a show the other day and saw a Vagisil commercial come on.  The actress actually said:  “I found out the hard way that not all feminine washes get rid of odor.”
                                                                  First of all, should someone actually be suffering from this problem, are commercials going to be their source of information?  Uh, shouldn’t you see a doctor or something? 
                                                                  Secondly, what the hell is the hard way?......I cannot even begin to guess. 
                                                                  Come to think of it, what is the easy way?

                                                                  Add Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  And Today....You Should Eat This 10/22/2011
                                                                  0 Comments
                                                                   
                                                                  The medical field and our understanding of nutrition has undeniably changed over the years.  I will be the first to admit that.  However, I also think that we should make our own decisions about nutrition- not just look at the government guidelines and assume that they know best.  We have an interesting situation: there are people who don’t trust the government to properly collect taxes, spend our money wisely, or protect our basic freedoms.  However, they are completely willing to believe that the government is not only wise about what our daily nutrition should be, but that the government is not affected in the slightest by special interests.  

                                                                  I’m taking no particular stand on the issue of nutrition.  I’m a big believer in the “make your own decisions and live with the consequences” school of thought.  I thought it would informative and slightly humorous to look at the advice given to us over the years, by both the government and the medical community, about what we should be consuming.  Enjoy!

                                                                  Picture
                                                                  Bad as it is to say, our best advice for eating came from this poster.  From the period of 1894 to 1940. 

                                                                  Picture
                                                                  In 1941 and 1942, this poster was widely used to inform the American people on good nutrition.  Note in particular the “vitamin rich fats, peanut butter and similar spreads” section of the poster.   In all honesty, it's not bad advice for the time, as the obesity rates were much lower. 

                                                                  Picture
                                                                  From 1943 to 1955, we now had the "Basic 7."  We still have butter with every single meal, including breakfast.  Not to mention, we better remember to eat dessert. 

                                                                  Picture
                                                                  By 1956, we’ve gotten rid of the fats (there was no distinction between healthy and unhealthy fats at this point), but there is still no upper limit on number of portions nor a guide to portion sizes.  Everything is “so many servings or more.” 

                                                                  Picture
                                                                  1979, we have the same basic groups we have today.  Fats are back and sweets are added, but only with a caution sign. 

                                                                  Picture
                                                                  In 1984, we were introduced to the Food Wheel. 

                                                                  Picture
                                                                  In 2000, we have our famous Food Pyramid.  For those who don’t remember, arguments abounded about the term that should be used for “Fats, Oils, & Sweets.”  They finally settled on “use sparingly.” 

                                                                  Picture
                                                                  Then came the "vertical" pyramid with a creepy "kind-of stick figure" running up the side.  I realize they were emphasizing getting exercise in, but it looks more like they were recommended we walk all over our food before we eat it. 

                                                                  Picture
                                                                  And,now, ta-da, we have been introduced to the "Plate."  Yes, ladies and gentlemen, after 70 years of medical research, they've finally figured out we eat off of a plate.  When you go to the government website to look at the plate, notice the words morphing between English and Spanish.  Because, unlike in National Treasure, there is NOT a treasure map on the backside of the Declaration of Independence.  It's really copied over in Spanish. 

                                                                  Add Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  Is There a Conspiracy? 10/11/2011
                                                                  0 Comments
                                                                   
                                                                  Picture
                                                                  Attorney General Eric Holder announced that the U.S. has stopped a plot instigated by certain factions of the Iranian government.  The goal of the plot was to bomb both the Israeli and Saudi Arabian embassies and to kill the ambassador from Saudi Arabia.  Mainstream news is covering the details, so I’ll skip those, but I wanted to highlight exactly what the spokesman (named Ali Akbar Javanfekr) for Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said: 
                                                                      “I think the U.S. government is busy fabricating a new scenario and history has shown both the U.S. government and the CIA have a lot of experience in fabricating these scenarios and this is just the latest one,” he said. “I think their goal is to reach the American public. They want to take the public’s mind off the serious domestic problems they’re facing these days and scare them with fabricated problems outside the country.”

                                                                  Maybe I simply don’t have the right mindset, but this seems a little farfetched.  Even assuming (and this is a big assumption) that the White House or Congress wanted to distract the American people with a fake attempted terrorist plot, exactly how would they carry this out? 
                                                                  To foil a plot, one must first prove that the plot existed with evidence, such as phone records, purchases of suspicious material (things to make explosives, for example), vehicle rentals or purchases, etc, etc, etc. 

                                                                  Therefore, it would follow that the government either is:
                                                                  1) Hiring people to do the suspicious actions mentioned above thus providing the evidence required
                                                                  -or-
                                                                  2) The people investigating the plot are fabricating evidence, meaning that multiple people in the FBI and DEA are developing a fake script, reports, evidence, etc., and then sticking to it. 

                                                                  Please take the poll below and/or leave a comment to share your opinion.    


                                                                  Sources:
                                                                  CNN. (2011, Oct. 11) Live blog: FBI, DEA thwart terror plot in U.S., involving Iran, officials say. CNN.com. Retrieved Oct. 11, 2011 from: http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2011/10/11/official-fbi-dea-disrupt-terror-plot-in-u-s-involving-iran/?hpt=hp_t1
                                                                  Fox News. (2011, Oct. 11) U.S. Ties Iran to Assassination Plot Against Saudi Diplomat on U.S. Soil. FoxNews.com. Retrieved Oct. 11, 2011 from: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2011/10/11/iranians-charged-over-terror-plot-in-us/
                                                                  Add Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  Humor: The Ant & the Grasshopper 08/05/2011
                                                                  1 Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  The Ant & the Grasshopper. 

                                                                  Most of you heard the old version of this story when you were young.  Just in case you missed it, here is how it goes:
                                                                   
                                                                  OLD VERSION:
                                                                  The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and  laying up supplies for the winter.
                                                                  The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
                                                                  Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.  The grasshopper has no food or shelter,  so he dies out in the cold.

                                                                   MORAL OF THE OLD STORY:  Be responsible for yourself!

                                                                  However, life has changed.  If a modern version were written, accounting for the political climate today and how (some) people view life, here is how the story would sound:

                                                                   MODERN VERSION:
                                                                  The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

                                                                  The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

                                                                  Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.

                                                                  CBS, NBC , PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with  a table filled with food.
                                                                             
                                                                  America is stunned by the sharp contrast.   How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is  allowed to suffer so?

                                                                  The grasshopper appears on Oprah and everybody cries when he sings, 'It's Not Easy Being Green.'

                                                                  ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film a group of protesters singing “We shall overcome.”

                                                                  Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray for the grasshopper's sake.

                                                                  President Obama condemns the ant and blames President Bush, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the Pope for the grasshopper's plight.  Not to mention the “religious right” and those who actually pay the taxes in this country.

                                                                  Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.  (Of course they do- the top 20% of earners who work the hardest should have to pay 90% of the nation’s taxes.)  They also draft a special piece of legislation giving the grasshopper a certain amount of money each month to help pay for those vital necessities like food and health care.  They take the money from military member’s pay. 

                                                                  Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer.  The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government Green Czar and given to the grasshopper.

                                                                  The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain it.

                                                                  The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.

                                                                  The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once prosperous and peaceful neighborhood.

                                                                  The entire Nation collapses as all of the ants have disappeared and the grasshoppers refuse to work.  This brings down the rest of the free world. 

                                                                   MORAL OF THE STORY:  Be careful how you vote in 2012.

                                                                  1 Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  A Bit of Humor 07/25/2011
                                                                  0 Comments
                                                                   
                                                                  My grandma sent me an e-mail with this story/joke in it.  The e-mail claimed it was a true story, but as I cannot verify the truthfulness of the tale, I'm going to post it as a joke.  Enjoy!

                                                                  The pastor of a church had a kitten that climbed up a tree in his backyard and then was afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc.

                                                                  The kitty would not come down. The tree was not sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided that if he tied a rope to his car and pulled it until the tree bent down, he could then reach up and get the kitten.

                                                                  That's what he did, all the while checking his progress in the car. He then figured if he went just a little bit further, the tree would be bent sufficiently for him to reach the kitten. But as he moved the car a little further forward, the rope broke.

                                                                  The tree went 'boing!' and the kitten instantly sailed through the air - out of sight.

                                                                  The pastor felt terrible. He walked all over the neighborhood asking people if they'd seen a little kitten. No. Nobody had seen a stray kitten.  So he prayed, 'Lord, I just commit this kitten to your keeping,' and went on about his business.

                                                                  A few days later he was at the grocery store, and met one of his church members. He happened to look into her shopping cart and was amazed to see cat food. This woman was a cat hater and everyone knew it, so he asked her, 'Why are you buying cat food when you hate cats so much?'

                                                                  She replied, 'You won't believe this,' and then told him how her little girl had been begging her for a cat, but she kept refusing.. Then a few days before, the child had begged again, so the Mom finally told her little girl, 'Well, if God gives you a cat, I'll let you keep it.' She told the pastor, 'I watched my child go out in the yard, get on her knees, and ask God for a cat. And really, Pastor, you won't believe this, but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her.'


                                                                  Add Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  Justice? 07/07/2011
                                                                  2 Comments
                                                                   
                                                                  I'm sure everyone has heard the verdict: Casey Anthony is found not guilty of all charges except for four counts of lying to the police.  With time served and time off for good behavior, she will be released in less than a week, on July 13th.  Of course, public response has been vocal.  Supporters of Casey Anthony, including a man asking Casey to marry him, were at the courthouse.  Even more people- against Casey Anthony- were present, chanting "Guilty!  Guilty!  Justice for Caylee!" 

                                                                  Setting aside the various bits of evidence (I'm writing a blog post, not a book!), it seems to come down to what swung the jury's opinion.  Despite multiple jurors admitting they thought she was guilty, the main problem was: not only was there no evidence that Casey murdered Caylee, the prosecution couldn't even answer "when, where, how, and why?" 

                                                                  I, personally, am a little bit sick that a young girl can be murdered without justice, but I am also very proud of the jury.  They came to a decision based on the evidence they were presented with, not emotion or public opinion.  (I know, I can already hear the disagreement!) 

                                                                  As always, I'm curious about what you think:
                                                                  Is Casey Anthony guilty of killing Caylee?
                                                                  Did the jury come to the right decision? 
                                                                  Did the prosecutors fail in not providing enough evidence, or did they do the best with what they had? 

                                                                  Sources:
                                                                  Carlton, Lindsey. (2011, July 6). "Prosecutor Jeff Ashton: 'I Can Only Assume...Jurors Didn't See What I Saw.'"  FoxNews.com.

                                                                  CNN. (2011, July 7). "Casey Anthony to be released from jail next week." CNN.com

                                                                  Fox News. (2011, July 7). "Casey Anthony to be Released from Jail Next Week, Court Rules." FoxNews.com

                                                                  Lendon, Brad. (2011, July 7). "Toobin: Judge made statement with Anthony sentencing." CNN.com

                                                                  Lendon, Brad. (2011, July 7). "Tearful Anthony jurors ask prosecutors, where was the evidence?" CNN.com


                                                                  2 Comments
                                                                   
                                                                  Patriotic Quotes 07/05/2011
                                                                  1 Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  Picture
                                                                  "Those who deny freedom to others deserve it not for themselves."  -Abraham Lincoln

                                                                  "A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government." -Edward Abbey

                                                                  "Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom, must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it."  -Thomas Paine

                                                                  "You have to love a nation that celebrates its independence every July 4, not with a parade of guns, tanks, and soldiers who file by the White House in a show of strength and muscle, but with family picnics where kids throw Frisbees, the potato salad gets iffy, and the flies die from happiness.  You may think you have overeaten, but it is patriotism."  -Erma Bombeck

                                                                  "In the truest sense, freedom cannot be bestowed; it must be achieved." -Franklin D. Roosevelt

                                                                  "It is amazing how many people seem to think that the government exists to turn their prejudices into laws." -Thomas Sowell

                                                                  *Note: As with most of the quotes, I've found the author's name online, so I cannot promise that the attribution is correct.
                                                                  Thanks to the following sources for the quotes:
                                                                  American Patriot Web.com
                                                                  QuoteGarden.com
                                                                  Jesus is Savior.com
                                                                  Thanks to nixxphotography for the image: http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=2217

                                                                  1 Comment
                                                                   
                                                                  << Previous
                                                                  Forward >>

                                                                    About Me

                                                                    Jennifer Becker Landsberger
                                                                    -Freelance Copywriter.  I also write for consumer magazines and the devotional market.  History major & working on my first book.  
                                                                    TheHousewifeModern WalkIntoTheBible

                                                                    Archives

                                                                    January 2012
                                                                    December 2011
                                                                    November 2011
                                                                    October 2011
                                                                    August 2011
                                                                    July 2011
                                                                    June 2011
                                                                    May 2011
                                                                    March 2011
                                                                    February 2011
                                                                    December 2010
                                                                    November 2010
                                                                    October 2010
                                                                    August 2010
                                                                    July 2010
                                                                    June 2010
                                                                    May 2010
                                                                    April 2010
                                                                    March 2010
                                                                    February 2010
                                                                    January 2010
                                                                    December 2009
                                                                    November 2009
                                                                    October 2009
                                                                    September 2009
                                                                    August 2009

                                                                    Check Google Page Rank
                                                                    CynicalMusings